It's Halloween Already??? Where Did The Time Go?

We knew it was going to be a great party. The invitation was casual and sent via e-mail: “Be In The Spirit.....No RSVP required...Just get your butt here and lets have some fun....I’ll have finger foods and plenty to drink” I had never met the host in person, just some “conversations” via the internet. He seemed like a good person and I was looking forward to meeting him. However, I had no idea what to expect. The reference to “finger foods” led me to believe that it wouldn’t be chips and dip. And I also didn’t know if the “plenty to drink” referred to fruit punch or alcoholic beverages. Oh well, always the adventurer. I wore skin tight snakeskin leggings and my leather thigh high boots. I didn’t want to come on as sexy right in the beginning but I just couldn’t help myself… YUP - that's me!!! Wet T-Shirt Contest Winner. My date (a/k/a my sister) went as one of the Cirque du Soleil clowns and her name was Santanya. I’ll post more pics at the bottom, so just scroll down if you don’t feel like reading. We passed the house up the first time because it looked like a hotel with a tennis court out front. I knew that Jack had a tennis court but what I wasn’t prepared for was the size of his home. It was HUGE!!! We were met by a uniformed attendant and shown where to park. Some of the guests had arrived by limo, as there was a white one out front. In the invitation, he had mentioned that he was going to have someone taking pictures. What he neglected to mention was that it was professional studio photographers with a set and everything. When you first walk in the door, you have to pose for a picture. Now I have been in some beautiful homes but never have I been in a home that was designed for parties like this one. We walked into this huge room with an indoor pool and spa with fiber optic lighting. It was clearly the focal point of the home. To the left was a room that looked like a cocktail lounge in a hotel. To the right was a room as huge as my whole house. Everything was so inviting and just downright comfortable. The wood was very dark and the main colors were maroon and gold. The bar, which was built in, sat about 15 people easily and had a granite top, could have been slate – not sure. The screened lanai had enough tables and comfy chairs for about 60 people. This house was obviously designed for fun. He had opened his garage which housed his Hummer and two mint condition red Thunderbirds. I think one was a ’55 and the other a ’56. Not sure. It was more of a showroom than a garage – the floor was spotless. I’ve never been in a cleaner garage in my life. Expectedly, there were plenty of young women in sexy costumes. I found out later that his kids were in attendance, so perhaps they were their friends. Almost everyone was in costume. Of course, I didn’t know a soul. I especially didn’t even know what the host looked like. He had sent me a picture but it wasn’t a good one. After we wandered through the house (probably with our mouths hanging open), we headed for the bar. While waiting for our drinks, a beautiful young thing presented us with a tray of canapés to choose from. I had my choice of every premium vodka you can imagine. I asked for the usual Absolut martini – very dry and up. Dumb blonde! The cups were plastic. Oh well. There were display cases with the most beautiful crystal glasses and stemware. I think I spotted a Baccarat or two – maybe Lalique, too. There were gorgeous candles everywhere – even in the powder room. The most gorgeous one was in the main room that housed the pool and spa. It looked like a collection of about 100 votives in one huge “bowl”. Straight out of “Phantom of the Opera”. We had lots of fun – me introducing myself as “Tiffany from Tittusville” pronounced “tit-us-ville” (it’s ty-tus-ville) and Corrie as “the mysterious Satanya”. My costume was a big hit – everyone wanted to have their picture taken with me. I had my camera in my purse and did not take ONE picture. Shame on me! The buffet had so much stuff on it, I can’t even remember. My favorite was skewers of shrimp. There were little chicken cutlets, potstickers, every kind of cheese you can imagine, sausage. I still managed to eat fairly low carb. Everything was really yummy and different. On the lanai, there was a huge cooler with bottles of beer from around the world. Out back were tiki huts that were tables with chairs. I didn’t go out back but I’m sure he has a boat. After we had been there for about two hours, I thought it might be appropriate to introduce myself to Jack, but I didn’t know who he was. I was forced to ask someone who he was. As it turned out, he was the priest. I asked him if he knew who I was and he said, honestly, “no”. I introduced myself and told him what a great party it was. He was extremely pleasant and I could tell he was very proud of his home and possessions, as he should be. He asked me how I was enjoying living in Florida. I mentioned that I had bought a kayak and he told me “I’ve got two out back that you are free to use”. His house is right on the river, so I guess it shouldn’t have surprised me that he would have kayaks. He even provided entertainment was fabulous – a fire eater, and a belly dancer who was really good. I’ll bet the party lasted until the sun came up – maybe later. We had a pretty good drive – about 40 minutes, so we said our goodbyes and left around 2 am. It would be nice if he and I could hit it off as friends. That’s all either of us are looking for. He’s got a Cessna 180 and a helicopter so we could have some fun for sure. I didn’t see the motorcycle. Maybe he got rid of it, which would be fine with me. The last thing I care to do is ride on a death trap. It appears that he is very much into material things and he sure doesn’t appear to need any more friends. But we’ll see. It would be nice to have someone to "hang" with. Here are the promised pics: This is all the pictures you get. I can't upload any more and don't know why. (And I'm freakin' tired of dealing with it!) The picture on the right makes me look fat, but I assure you those are size 12 pants! Corrie looked fabulous!!!

A Quick Trip to the Mountains

A BIT OF A SAD NOTE TO THIS POST: The picture you see here was taken on our little "getaway" the first week-end in June. Sometime during the second week of June, there was a forest fire that consumed thousands of acres. It was called the "Oak Creek Fire". What you see here is now nothing but blackened stumps. The fire lasted almost two weeks and burned everything in its way - homes, businesses, campgrounds. The sad part is that it was started by a human - an unattended campfire. The impact that man has on our envirenment is sometimes so confounding, confusing and downright sad. Read on to see what happens when two old ladies get a "wild hare". It’s Wednesday night, May 31st. The girls get a wild hare and decide to take a quick camping trip to the mountains. Needing their beauty sleep they, of course, didn’t get up until 9 am on Thursday. Then if was off to the trailer yard to pick up the trailer, stop at a hardware store to have a cute guy check the connections, wash the trailer, (no WE didn’t wash the trailer, we paid some Mexicans to do it), pick up the dogs, along with some last minute things at the apartment and we’re on our way. (almost) A “quick” stop at Discount tire to have the tires checked turned into a bit of an ordeal. Long story short, the trailer and the truck both need tires. I asked the cute guy that was helping me “if your mother were driving on these tires, would you let her go to Flagstaff?” His reply – “since it’s cooler up there, I’d let her”. OK so we’re on our way. (almost) A stop at Sonic to pick up our lunch and we’re finally on our way. We got as far as Payson before we needed gas. That’s about 185 miles on one full tank of gas. There was a Walmart close to the gas station, so we decided to get our groceries there, instead of waiting until we got to Flagstaff. Good thing – we didn’t get to Flagstaff until 6:00 pm. They were in the middle of remodeling and there was no rhyme or reason to where anything was. The drive from Payson to Flagstaff (the “back” or scenic route”) is just a gorgeous drive. Huge Pondersa pines, clumps of Aspen, oak trees – just so green and lush. We finished setting up at 7, climbed into the front bed and watched a DVD. Needless to say – we were exhausted. A breakfast at the Galaxy Diner on Route 66 started our day! Then we headed to red rock country – Sedona. Psychic capital of the world. The drive down is precarious to say the least. It’s a two lane, windy road with sheer drops and no shoulder in many places. The elevation was about 8,000 feet and you could look straight down. Twas terribly frightening - a two valium drive. With no valium!!! It really made us nervous when we came on a rollover accident, blocking one lane. I offered my services as an EMT but the fire department had just gotten there. You could tell that the guy was speeding, hit the shoulder and overcompensated. In Sedona, our first stop was my favorite place – the Crystal Palace. They sell crystals, bath stuff, candles – it’s a “metaphysical” kinda pace. Smells good and is very relaxing. I got both of us a chair massage so we’d be “fresh” for sightseeing and window shopping. The prices are just horrible but you see things that you just wouldn’t see in a metropolitan area. Really different stuff. Really expensive stuff. Here are some pictures we took in Sedona. On Saturday, we investigated downtown Flagstaff. It’s such a cute town. Just what you would imagine for a town near a ski resort. Of course everything was horribly expensive. So – I proceeded to look for (and found) a Ross. The skirt that was $79 in a cute little shop was $9.00 at Ross. Look how much I saved!!! The trip back to Phoenix only took about 3 hours. We were heading down from the mountains instead of going up. At one point, some guys got our attention and told us that there was a bar hanging down from the truck. It was the sway bar that had already fallen town twice. Here we were dragging it at 65 miles an hour. I’m surprised the trailer didn’t catch fire from the sparks. I almost wish it had – I’ve got full replacement value insurance. It was 105 in the valley when we returned. Laying on the gravel, putting the tire covers in that heat was one of the reasons I don't take the trailer out more often. I hope you enjoyed hearing about our adventure. More later. Carroll

A Day at the Zoo

ALL THE LAKES WERE CROWDED SO WE HIT THE ZOO What a great day we had! Spent about four hours at the zoo. I won't bore you with the details, but we managed to stay ahead of or behind the many "stroller brigades". The highlight of the visit was watching a grandmother, daughter and 4 month old baby orangutan eat, play and nap. The baby was just adorable and fought taking a nap like any other toddler. We never got a picture of the baby but here are some pictures you might enjoy. We especially enjoyed the prairie dog colony - they are so cute!!!!!

Yes, flamingos in Arizona! Can you believe that??? After the zoo, we visited Tuesday Morning, an outlet/closeout store. I had been looking for square melamine dinnerware for the trailer. (All the cupboards are square - why not the dishes?) Would you believe I found them? And in HOT PINK!!! My new decor is going to be navy blue and pink. (in the trailer) Now if I could only find square paper plates. Got any ideas??? Afterwards, we found an outdoor restaurant in Scottsdale and had dinner on the patio. Thank goodness for the Entertainment book - it sure has paid for itself.

Chi Wow Wow Races

I guess you’ve figured out by now that I do not know how to spell that damn dog breed’s name. I could look it up but am too lazy. On Saturday, after Cinqo de Mayo, I headed back to El Zocalo for a little “hair of the dog”. The place is owned by a Mexican couple and his name is (can’t spell this either) Debed. Not the sofa but de bed! I needed a little “hair of the dog” and ordered a Pacifico, a Mexican beer that’s served with a wedge of lime. After pondering about three seconds, I ordered a shot of tequila. Debed (not de sofa) asked me what kind I wanted and I was totally stumped. He has a whole wall with nothing but bottles of tequila. They range from low (but not rotgut – he won’t serve it) quality to exceptionally high quality “sipping” tequila. Now the only tequila I know about is Jose Cuervo and Don Julio – which is what I used to buy every time I went to Mexico. If you want to know a little about tequila, go here: http://www.beerliquors.com/buy/liquors/donjulio.htm. Did you know that tequila can only be manufactured in Mexico and is one of the most pure spirits you can drink? (And all that talk about donkey piss) I asked for a shot of Don Julio and he said – which kind, silver, anejo or real. (Pronounced RE – AL) I asked how much they were. $10 a shot (a SHOT, mind you) for the silver and anejo and $200 for the real. OK, let’s forget about the real. I settled for the $10 shot. I was teased by the other patrons at the bar because I didn’t swig it in one gulp, like gringos do. Instead, Don Julio is a tequila to be savored, just like Grand Marnier. So I did, to the appreciation of Debed. (Not de sofa). OKOKOKOK – I know it’s getting old, I just think it’s so damn funny. Anyway, his wife joined me and we chatted for awhile. (They had donated a dinner for two when I was collecting items for the raffle put on by the Community Policing Advisory Board, of which I am the co-chair.) They are really nice people and treat me especially nice. Then it was off to the chi-wow-wow races for me. What fun that was! The most fun was being surrounded by (mostly) little dogs. A lot of dogs were dressed up in the Mexican style, but lots were not! The lady in this picture was being interviewed by a TV station. There were booths set up that were selling all kinds of “doggy stuff” – clothes, natural foods, sunglasses, photo albums, basically you name it. One item that caught my eye (that I could kick myself for not buying) was a bandana that the collar actually goes through. TiAmo and Taccia hate bandanas that are tied around their necks. There was one little dog that I absolutely fell in LOVE with. It was a miniature Pomeranian. I have never seen a little dog with such an attitude. She would bark at other dogs and you could almost hear her saying “this is MY space – get out”. She just loved people but had such a diva like attitude. “I’m the Princess and don’t you forget it!” I wish I had been able to get a picture of her. Adorable she was!!! The chi-wow-wow races are an absolute hoot! They have 5 or 6 lanes with a person at one end and the owner at the finish line. In some races, none of the dogs will take off. In others, 5 dogs will just sit at the starting gate and one will run. Sometimes the dogs will stop mid-race and pee on one another. I left the races before they were over and went to El Zocalo for dinner and another shot of tequila. My table was ready as soon as I arrived and (no surprise here) it was the best table in the house. My waiter looked like John Travolta’s little brother and the mariachi band was just great. I ordered chili relleno, which seems to be all I ever order at a Mexican restaurant. What I neglected to tell you is what a great place the outside patio is at this restaurant. It’s almost overgrown with bougainvillea, roses, vines and beautiful flowers. The floor is brick and there are fans and misters to keep you cool. The tables are wrought iron with linen tablecloths and the service and the food is great! Sometimes they have a cowboy singer who is an absolute HOOT! He tells stories in between songs. Fortunately I walked to the races and dinner, so I was able to have a couple of gold margaritas (ok – or three or four) and walk home. It was a beautiful night and I didn’t have to work the next day. A great time for me. This is the kid that I danced with all night. He was cute, funny and very, very young. I think I reminded him of his grandmother. At least I've still got some "sass". Cutie pie without his glasses for sure.

Cinco de Mayo

Cinco de Mayo actually fell on a Friday night. The Mexicans have a joke around here that only gringos celebrate the holiday as an excuse to get drunk. At any rate, that's whatcha do, I guess. I was going to meet a friend at a local Mexican restaurant, El Zocalo. (Which is walking distance from my apartment.) She said she would get there about 5:15 and get us a table. I worked kinda late and was on my way when she called and said that there were NO TABLES available and that there was a TWO HOUR WAIT! She put our names in and I decided that we'd go to the Elephant Bar for cocktails and appetizers. It's a great place - decorated like a jungle, but very tasteful and upscale. The door handles are actually bronze elephants. She had coconut shrimp and I had calamari and we each had two Belvedere martinis. MMMMMMM We stayed and chatted for a couple of hours and I couldn't figure out where to go next. Believe it or not, I'm not well acquainted with places to go "out". She decided to call El Zocalo and guess what??? Our table was ready. Since we had already eaten heavy appetizers, we munched on nachos, had a few margaritas and decided to go to another bar where we heard that they had kareoke. Now I LOVE kareoke - to listen OR participate. The people who got up were very good - you could tell they had done their songs before. The problem was that the songs were all current pop songs. I hardly knew a one! Oh well, it was a fun night anyway. More later!

Solo Patrol Assist

Here I am in uniform, in my patrol car ready to go it alone for the first time. I was all excited when the computer displayed "DISPATCHED". I pressed the button to find out what exciting event I had been dispatched to. It was the dispatch crew asking me if I could go get them dinner at Boston Market. What a letdown. Later I got dispatched to an area where 6 cars were parked in a "No Parking" zone. I succeeded in getting 5 of them moved by their owners and wrote my very first citation on the one whose owner I couldn't find. The rest of the night was pretty quiet until around 9:00 pm. A drunk was driving down one of the main roads, endangering other drivers. It took 6 police officers to stop him and he finally ended up crashing into a wall. When I heard what happened on the radio, I put myself "out of service" and headed back to the station. If I had gotten dispatched to that call I would have been out until midnight. I have to work for a living!!!

A Day in the life of a Patrol Assist officer.

I made a promise to myself that I would keep up to date on my blog and post at least once a week. So, here I am. The week was relatively uneventful. I did speak with a guy who is in the Executive’s Association of Greater Phoenix, along with my boss, who owns a big moving company. They have storage facilities throughout Florida and after the conversation with him, I feel a LOT less stressed about the move. Friday after work, I did my Costco and Walmart thing. Saturday am I picked up everything off the floor and vacuumed in preparation for the carpet to be cleaned. I’m afraid that the dogs are having more and more accidents as they get older. I also had the 5’ x 8’ accent rugs cleaned. They were just plain dirty. I think the last time I had them cleaned was a couple of years ago. I had signed up for a shift at the police department from 1600 to 2200 (2pm to 10pm) They ask you to sign up for a minimum of 6 hours, mainly because it takes you 45 minutes to get on the road and another 30 minutes at the end of your shift to file reports, return equipment, etc. So, I sign in and begin the preparation process which I won’t bore you with but it involves obtaining fresh supplies, checking out a citation book, inventorying the vehicle, checking the oil, testing the lights & siren, adjusting the seat, mirrors, etc; logging on to the computer system in the vehicle (for which I had to be certified as a “Criminal Justice Internet System” operator), and basically getting ready to hit the street. I am still in training and have to have a uniform to drive. My uniform won’t be ready until next week, so I rode with another officer named Mike. We weren’t in the car five minutes when we get dispatched to a fire. We get to the fire and our job is to protect the scene and not allow anyone onto the scene or drive over the fire hoses, which are quite expensive. Some punk kid had set the mulch at a playground on fire. The problem was that it was twenty feet from homes and could have spread very rapidly as it was a windy day. Fortunately, it didn’t spread, but the punk destroyed a $30,000 playground that had been built of wood and steel to resemble a tree house. That took us a couple of hours and we arranged to meet up with some officers for pizza around 7. Then, we tagged a couple of abandoned vehicles and ticketed a couple of vehicles for parking in handicapped spots. It was about 6:30, so Mike said “why don’t we head over to Venezia’s?” (the pizza place) I said OK and proceeded to put the code in to dispatch for “on our way to eat”. OOPS. We were a few blocks from the apartment when I realized that I hadn’t taken the dogs out before I left. No problem, I cancelled the “going to dinner” code and put in “out of service” code while I took the dogs for a walk. Then “back in service – but headed out for dinner” code. We go a couple of blocks and UH OH. We see plumes of thick black smoke. We knew it was a residential area, so we headed there and got officially dispatched a few seconds later. It was only about a mile from my apartment, the police station and downtown Chandler. We got there in mere seconds and Mike proceeded to park the car, blocking the road, and started setting out cones. I realized that the fire department was going to be putting their “lines” (a/k/a hoses) out down the street because there was a hydrant there. We guided the fire trucks into the staging area. The fire was literally roaring out of control, and the tension was very high. Sure enough, they put their lines out across a road that wasn’t blocked. People (“lookie loos”) were pulling in from a main road onto this side street to see what was going on. I stood in the middle of the road (yes, I had my police traffic vest on) and stopped vehicles from going any further where they would run over the hose. I made people turn around and go back to the main road. I was pretty proud of myself – they actually did what I told them too. It wasn’t long before I realized that I needed a patrol car at the entrance to the side street to block traffic. The sun was starting to go down and I don’t have an orange cone for my flashlight that is specifically used for directing traffic. I radioed for assistance and within a couple of minutes, a car came and relieved me. So, back to the car blocking the street that the fire was on. A few minutes later (now we’ve been there about 30 minutes so far), a lady came up to us telling us her husband had locked his keys in his car and could we help. “That’s what we do” I told her. Fortunately, Mike volunteered to do it. I’m standing at the car, protecting the scene when a huge truck comes straight at me. Slowly, thankfully. It’s almost upon me before I realize that it’s the fire department’s support truck. Whew!!! I let them run over my cones to the staging area. This is the truck that carries extra oxygen tanks, lighting, water, and extra supplies for the firefighters. We were there about two hours, in all. We can’t leave until all hoses are up and the fire department is leaving. So now, it’s 9:00pm. We put in the “out of service - eating” code and about 8 of us went to the pizza place. Dispatch won’t call you when you’re out of service eating unless it’s a dire emergency. They know that we need nourishment and a break. After eating, we get dispatched to an abandoned car complaint. We write a ticket and a report and are heading back to the station around 10pm. We hear a call for a 962, which is an accident with injuries – usually serious. Since we were the only Patrol Assist vehicle, Mike says “do you want to go, or do you want me to drop you at the station?” I was getting my second wind, so I said “let’s go”. BIG MISTAKE. We head for the accident (which was only about 1 mile west of my apartment) when we get the “ALL PD” message on the computer and tone on the radio. This means only one thing – BIG TROUBLE!!! They are dispatching the entire police department for one reason or another. We soon found out that the accident had knocked out all of the street and traffic lights for about five miles on THE major east/west road – Chandler Blvd. (Where I live) This is major chaos. They assign officers to every intersection to direct traffic. Dispatch couldn’t give us a specific assignment, so we drove to each intersection and spoke to the officer in charge to see what they wanted us to do. Seems that setting out flares and getting traffic vests was the biggest service we could provide. So, starting with the busiest intersection, we parked and set out flares for about 50 yards behind each of four police cars parked at each intersection. We literally ran. We drive back to the station for more flares. We replace the almost spent flares with new ones and set a fresh flare on the end of each active flare so that it will ignite when the other flare starts to burn down. Let me tell you, we had boxes and boxes and boxes of flares in our trunk. When we get the opportunity to take a “break”, we take it in the middle of the intersection with four cops – each directing traffic. Two for north/south and two for east/west. What was truly amazing was how many people driving through the intersection were talking on cell phones. Now this is 1:30 – 2:00 in the morning. Also, I’m sure there were many impaired drivers as the bars let out then. A few people said they “didn’t see the lights” and almost breezed through the intersection. The cops would yell at them “there are four police cars and multiple flares at every dam intersection and you didn’t see the lights???” When I say YELL – I mean in a big, booming cop voice. Long story short, I got home at 4:30 am. So, here I sit at 6:00 in the evening, doing laundry and cleaning house while everyone else is enjoying “cocktail hour”. I didn’t get up until 2:30 in the afternoon. I’m typing this in between my chores of cleaning the floors and doing laundry. I usually am sipping my “Sunday martini” by now. I just ate breakfast at 3:30. Guess the toonie will have to wait for another night. Or…maybe I’ll run a bath and sip it amongst fragrant bubbles. We’ll see. Another promise…future blogs will NOT be as long and they will contain pictures. This and the previous couple of blogs were just to bring you up to date as to what is happening in my world these days.

Very Manly S&#T

What an experience! I’ve spent the entire Saturday for the last eight weeks training for the Chandler Police Department’s Patrol Assist program. What is it, you ask? Allow me to explain. As you know, I am enrolled in the Citizen Corps Volunteer program. The deal is that the government will pay off my student loan (for my EMT certification) to the tune of $2,600. The course and class materials cost me about $800. So…I make out, right? I don’t know how many hours I’ve got in right now, but I think it’s somewhere around 300. I could only go back to August to count my volunteer hours, or I would have already exceeded the 900. So – what is Patrol Assist??? It’s pretty much what it sounds like. As a volunteer, I will drive a patrol car and do whatever the patrol officers, detectives, or any sworn officer needs done. This might include traffic control at the scene of an accident, pushing disabled or wrecked cars off to the side of traffic, helping with paperwork, assisting with the transfer of evidence at a crime scene, transporting uninjured citizens at a collision scene, etc. I am also trained how to break into vehicles “legally” using specialized tools. This might include stolen cars, vehicles at a crime scene, situations where a kid is locked in a car, or a citizen locked their car with the keys inside and the car running. My duties also include writing tickets for parking violations, ticketing and towing abandoned cars, vacation watches, patrolling certain public areas such as airports, parks, water treatment plants, malls, etc. No, it’s nowhere as rewarding as my work in Victim’s Services, but it’s rewarding in its own way. I’m like an “assistant” to police officers. And, boy – do they appreciate us. We take a huge load off of the officers, allowing them to do their jobs. One of the most FUN training days started with a trip to a local junkyard. They equipped each of us (a class of 12) with a “lockout kit” and our job was to break into a minimum of 12 locked cars. I was done in an hour (must be something to do with the “feminine touch”), so I went over to the area where the junkyard dogs are kept. I notice that there is one dog, probably a pit bull, is tied up, but the other dog, a shepherd of some kind, is not. OK – he’s HUGE. Then I notice that there is a gate. That’s open…OOPS. This huge shepherd comes sauntering out of the enclosure and looks at me. What do I do? I FREEZE. You can’t even imagine how many thoughts were going through my head. From “OMG you’re going to die” to “maybe he’s a nice dog”. So…I stood completely still. The dog came up to me and I held out my hand for him to sniff. He sniffs my hand and then starts licking it. OK – no problemo here. Just about then, the other guys noticed what was going on and proceeded to tell me that they would distract the dog while I walked away. MEN! I felt like a “damsel in distress”. But did I need them? Not at all. I said “I’m fine – want to pet him?” It was an absolute HOOT!!! But that wasn’t all… We broke for lunch. Fortunately, I live close enough to the police department that I could come home for lunch. I just don’t like fast food. PLUS – it’s really hard to do low carb when you eat out. We were to meet an hour later at the Firebird Race Track. I teased all the guys (did I tell you that I was – and still am – the only woman enrolled in the progam?) about bringing my crash helmet. WHOA – wish I had one. Everyone drove their own vehicles to the race track. We’re standing in a group and get introduced to our instructor – an ex cop and now an instructor at the Bondurant School of Driving who specializes in training police officers. OK – I dressed fairly “macho” that day – uniform pants and a plain T-shirt. I didn’t feel “different” like I had in previous classes. All we saw was the racetrack and cones set up. Mark proceeds to demonstrate the first exercise. We are to accelerate to 25 mph, and when he says “left” or “right”, brake and swerve (through – not into) the cones in whatever direction he says. What he didn’t tell us is that he would state the command when we were right on top of the cones. The first time around, it took all the willpower I had NOT to slam on the brakes before he said his command. He waited until the very last second to say “left” or “right”. We had to do it three times. I did OK. No cones down. I’m feeling pretty confident at this point but now he says “OK – we’re going to try the same exercise, but now at 45 mph”. Guess what? I aced it three times in a row. The last guy is doing the exercise and we’re all standing around teasing each other about how many times we had to repeat the drill. (Some of the guys had to do it 4 or 5 times before they got it right.) I had no sooner quit bragging that I only had to do it 3 times, when the instructor motioned me over and said “I wasn’t happy with that last run – you’re doing it again”. I’m thinking to myself – “what is this – boot camp?” So – what did I do? I got cocky. The result? I plowed through (instead of around) the cones and killed myself. So then I had to do it three more times. The guys had a great laugh at my expense. The next exercise had to do with swerving (left or right, depending upon the instructor’s whim) and NOT braking at all – at 25 mph. Then – the same exercise at 45 mph. Let’s just say I passed and leave it at that. It was an adrenaline rush, ok. Your instinct says “SLAM ON THE BRAKES NOW”, but you can’t. The “grand finale” came when he taught us how to do the “J Turn”. Why is it called the “J Turn”? I have no idea. What this is? You start out driving backwards (and we had to get up to 45 mph), slamming on the brake, turning the wheel (and doing a lot of praying that you won’t die) and end up going in the same direction but facing forward instead of backwards. Whew! I hope I never have to do it. It’s like the old “E” ticket ride at Disney. At any rate, I graduated this past Saturday. I got: Police department badges, Patrol Assist badges, OC (aka “pepper spray), a belt, a radio holster, a flashlight holster, OC holster, all in all… VMS… Very manly shit !!! I can’t wait to tell you about going to look for “accessories” for my uniform. I went to buy work boots. Of course, I was dressed in a white skirt, sequined tank top and my fuschia heels. Looking for “manly shit”, like boots, gloves, rain poncho, etc. I go to a sporting goods store looking for VMS, right? (Remember my attire) I am looking for steel toed work boots and they don’t make them in a woman’s size 11n, so I have to buy men’s. I put these things on and immediately exclaim “these are the ugliest things I’ve ever seen, I’m not wearing them”. Everyone nearby looked and started laughing their heads off. So, I settled for a pair of hiking boots that weren’t quite as ugly. I got a couple of disposable rain ponchos, a pair of black leather gloves and a pair of heavy gloves with gripper thingies on the fingers.. Then, at the uniform store, I had to get fitted for my uniform and get my police bag. I asked the sales person about a holster for my belt for “things”. She said “what things?” I said – “you know, lipstick, a compact, wipies, Kleenex, etc.”. She looked at me like I had just grown a beard. She comes back with “we don’t carry anything like that in stock, you’ll have to have it custom made. Make a list of exactly what you want to put in it and I’ll have it made for you.” MAKE A LIST?????? Is she crazy? How can I make a list of “stuff”. You know what women carry in their purses. You try making a list. More later!

An Afternoon and Evening to Remember

First of all, you must understand that the gentleman in this occasion is a friend and just a friend. We met at the Arabian horse show in Scottsdale in January. We started “chatting” about his horses – he owns a ranch in the Santa Catalina mountains outside of Tucson. During our conversation, he told me that his girlfriend of four years had just broken up with him and that he would be interested in becoming “pals”. We had dinner a couple of times, nothing special, but pleasant and enjoyable. (He’s a good bit older but a really nice guy.) At any rate, we’re having dinner at one of my favorite seafood restaurants and he says “have you ever seen Cirque du Soleil?”. (DUH – I’ve only seen six different shows) Of course I didn’t say that – I wouldn’t hurt his feelings for the world. Instead, I said that had seen a couple. He said that he had bought two tickets for his girlfriend and him back in December to see the new one, “Corteo” and would I like to see the show. Wow!! You bet!!! He was staying at the Ritz Carleton, so I met him in the lobby at 2:00. The show wasn’t until 4:00 but he asked me to be there at 2. I wondered why. I thought his vehicle was the “pick-em-up truck” that I had been in before. Noooooo – it was his car. Turns out he has several of them. This was the Mercedes sedan. We get to Westworld where the show is being held and we’re almost an hour early. I’m thinking “what the heck are we going to do for 45 minutes – stand outside?” He proceeds to the “VIP” parking area, and I didn’t think anything about it – he’s a first class kinda guy. Well… We proceed to a special entrance labeled “Tapis Rouge”. OMG – you won’t believe it – we were handed a special name badge, a glass of champagne and ushered into the tent. Whoa – there were four bars set up, serving champagne, wine, beer, soft drinks and sodas. There were four hors d’ouvre stations and baskets hanging from the ceiling with appetizers in puff pastry and little pastry shells. The lighting in the room was compliments of paper lamps and lanterns with red shades. There were red sofas and chairs to sit on, as well as several bars with no chairs that you could set your “stuff” on. NOW I know why we were early. I (of course) was the only person who was “dressed” but I didn’t care. There were a couple of little girls whose mom had dressed them up as princesses. (I whispered “well, at least some of us know how to dress”.) We hung out for a while and were ushered to our seats – three rows from the stage. (Which were very narrow – not like in Las Vegas) As we were seated, we were handed a program. (Which I know from experience cost $40) Of the Cirque shows that I’ve seen, almost all of them have been in the “half round” configuration. This was almost a full circle. Actually two “half rounds”. The stage was circular. There were 5 chandeliers on the stage behind a gauzy curtain decorated with angels. Of course, the show starts with the clowns in the audience. The story is of a clown who sees his own funeral, then relives his life. I thought it was going to be dark, but is wasn’t. The moral is that life is a journey – to be enjoyed. I swear, it was the funniest Cirque show I’ve ever seen. Totally unexpected, which is what every Cirque show has been. At intermission, here come the ushers again to escort us back to the tent. There was more champagne, flavored coffees and more desserts than you can imagine. The only one I tasted was a Haagen Das strawberry champagne sorbet. The portions were less than small – tiny is too big an adjective. But, then again, I’m not a big dessert eater. Two bites was plenty. You’re going to drool over this – they also had hot fudge sundaes, Haagen Das ice cream in 7 flavors, a chocolate fountain and wonderful things to dunk into it like marshmallows, strawberries, apples, pound cake, pears – basically you name it. It was fun to watch the kids (not that there were very many) – they thought that they had made it to Willy Wonka’s. After intermission, we were ushered back to our seats. The second half was every bit as good as the first. As we left, each person (only Tapis Rouge people) was handed a gift bag which contained a feather boa, a CD of “Best of Cirque du Soleil”, and a T-shirt. Cool, but that’s not all… I had no idea where we were going for dinner, but since Emmet was staying at street close – Fleming’s Steak House. It’s akin to a Ruth’s Chris. Unfortunately, we were seated near the kitchen, so it was a bit busy. I was actually surprised that Emmet didn’t slip the Maitre d’ a twenty to get a good table. Oh well, the food was excellent. I ordered a Belvedere martini – “up” of course. It came in a stainless steel martini glass. Icy cold and yummy. So yummy, I ordered another one. Emmet ordered Filet Mignon Oscar and I ordered a lobster tail. My only “special request” was that the waiter keep my melted butter hot. I tell you, he was there every ten minutes, bringing me hot butter. There was NO WAY I wasn’t going to order the Grand Marnier chocolate lava cake. In fact, you have to order before you order your entrée. Did I share? NO WAY. Shortly after dinner, we had an espresso at the Ritz. (God only knows how much that cost – two martinis at the Ritz cost $36. I knew that from a night out a few years ago.) Emmet ordered my car and kissed me on the cheek. All in all it was a great night. Fortunately, it only took me 20 minutes to drive home. Between the martinis the full belly and the espressos (which put me to sleep – go figure), I was a tired puppy. It was a bummer that this was a Sunday night and I had a boatload of work waiting for me at the office.

Two Gals and the "Chocolate Affaire"

While looking for something cheap (or free) to do this week-end, we stumbled upon the City of Glendale's "Chocolate Affaire". So...there we headed. We ended up parking about two blocks from where the action was and glad to be walking. Downtown Glendale AZ is known as the plalce to go to for antiques. It's an old part of town and most of it isn't very nice. But, of course, everything was "gussied up" for this event. There were maybe a hundred booths. The first one we came to sold almonds and cashews flavored in just about every way imaginable. Chocolate (of course), cinnamon sugar, garlic, jalapeno, barbequed - you name it. Then there was the booth with everything you could think of dipped in chocolate - nuts, potato chips, pretzels, etc. The next booth was a place where you could have your picture taken and put (as a sugar layer) on top of a good sized piece of chocolate. Every where you looked there were candied apples of every flavor, chocolate covered strawberries, fresh squeezed lemonade and every confection you can imagine. We were pretty smart - I had made us hash and eggs before we left so we werent't starving when we got there. Corrie had a funnel cake and I had a chocolate shake. By then we were over the crowd, the kids, the food and the chocolate. On the way home, we drove through downtown Scottsdale so that Corrie could see the streets lined with bouganvilla, palm trees and bronze statues. There must be a hundred galleries just in downtown Scottsdale alone. We even recognized some of the artists - Picasso, Chagall, Matisse, Dali - just to name a few. It's a whole day trip so we agreed we'd "do" Scottsdale some other time. Today (Sunday), we got our chores done and went to Harrah's Ak Chin casino. We had each both gotten "free" money in the mail and still had $40 left from our previous gambling trip. Armed with $20 each and Corrie's $15 in "free money" and my $8, we hit the slots. 45 minutes later, we left with $40 between us, a keychain flashlight each, a tee shirt and a coupon for more "free money" on Ebay. OBoy!!! Tonight we are probably the only apartment in the whole community without the Super Bowl on. We're watching Andrea Bocelli with ice skating stars. Then, it's "Grey's Anatomy". We are just having TOO much fun. More later!

Las Vegas Christmas 2005 - Our Last Night

At the very end of our wonderful Las Vegas Christmas vacation. We had such a great time!!! I don't think we ever felt rushed or bored, hungry or thirsty, and we enjoyed every single moment of this once-in-a-lifetime treat. This last day we tried to squeeze in every little bit of fun that we could. Dinner was at Savannah's Steakhouse at the Tropicana. Dad had his usual filet (at a steakhouse - of course!!!) Mom had salmon tartare and I had fried shrimp. Dinner was great and we lingered until the last possible second. We still ended up with a few minutes to kill before the show, so we donated to the Tropicana's coffers. And now, ladies and gentlemen... We were guided to our seat, which was actually a half-moon shaped booth. We were on the first tier and the closest booths to the stage. The show was everything we expected and more. We had chosen to go to the "adult" show, which was actually topless. We all agreed later that the numbers where the dancers/acrobats/showgirls were clothed were actually more provocative than the topless ones. The girls have to be in peak physical shape and now that the emphasis is on THIN - many of them had no breasts at all! Well, almost. Here's rundown on the show. It was a "celebration of the female", and started with "Romance: 1850". A royal ball. Not at all what you would expect from a Las Vegas show. The next acts were: "The New Woman: 1920", which featured "Flappers, Vamps and a Tango". "Hollywood Glamour - 1930". The showgirls were on a round stage that revolved with a giantic mirror. It was just like the shows you've seen in the old musicals. "The Big Band Era - 1940" was really cool with swing dancing, "the pin-up" and "The Strip" segments. Then came "Sophistication - 1950" This was your "typical" Las Vegas show show. Big headdresses, lavish costumes, etc. After that came: "Rock & Roll - 1960" - they drove up in a '59 Chevy (I think - correct me if I'm wrong, Dad) and did a rock and roll show called "The Prom Queen". Then "Love & Peace 1970's". Nothing special but still fun to watch. INTERMISSION Wally Eastwood...this guy comes on stage and starts juggling with silver bowling pins - he was really, really good at it. After a while, he stops and introduces himself. (PS - there is absolutely NO WAY that I am going to make this sound funny. After the show we all agreed that he was one of the top ten comedians we had ever seen) He says "Hi folks, my name is Wally Eastwood. My dad was an Alabama redneck and my mom was from Mexico. That makes me a Mexican redneck, I think." Then he goes into a routine whereby he blows ping-pong balls up into the air and juggles them with his mouth. Abruptly he stops "you know, you guys think this is good. Do you know that I do this six days a week, two shows a day? You try going into a bank to get a loan and tell them this is what you do for a living." He interrupted his performance several times to talk very nonchalantly about his life. He was so funny, we were holding our sides. I sure wish I could relay the hilarity - but I can't. After a while, he brings out this box, which turns out to be a piano that he plays by bouncing rubber balls onto the keys. It was incredible. He played "The Star Spangled Banner" but ended up bringing down the house with "I'm Proud to Be an American" - WITH RUBBER BALLS ON THIS PIANO IN A BOX. It was absolutely fabulous. We would have been happy to see the show end after his performance, but there was about another hour of showgirls and song anad dance numbers. It was really great! But we were tired and had to fly home the next day. Fortunately, we weren't leaving at the crack of dawn. We went back to our hotel. Of course, you can't just climb into bed and fall asleep. So...I stopped at the roulette table one last time and won enough to be able to go home with the same amount of gambling money that I left with. (Which wasn't much to begin with - only as much as I could afford to throw away) So, that's our story. It was wonderful - fun, energizing and tiring. And we enjoyed every single second!

Las Vegas Christmas 2005 - Sightseeing

We think we spent Monday the 26th just doing some sightseeing, hotel hopping and window shopping. Here are a few pictures for your viewing enjoyment...

This was the "House of Blues" at some hotel. I think it was something from a movie. "The Blues Brothers" maybe???

Here is the happy couple in front of the House of Blues.

Here is what Las Vegas was starting to look like to me...

Las Vegas Christmas 2005 - Christmas Night

Aren't we beautiful??? We FELT beautiful. Mom had on a new dress, top and sweater that she had just bought and I wore a royal blue halter top cocktail dress.

There are no pictures from our dinner this evening because the restaurant was so POSH that we were embarrassed to ask the waiter to take a picture. None of us remembers what we had for dinner that night. All that we remember is that it was sophisticated and luxurious.

We had fabulous seats for "O". The stage was a huge water tank and water nymphs would appear and disappear. At times, the water would appear to become a solid stage for dancers and acrobats. It was the most spectacular show that any of us had ever seen. To try and describe what we saw would do a great injustice to the show. If you want to know more, go to the Cirque du Soleil website: www.cirquedusoleil.com

Las Vegas Christmas 2005 - Christmas Day

We tried to sleep as late as we could, as our dinner reservations aren't until 7:30 and the show starts at 10:30. Memories are starting to get hazier and blurrier as time passes. I sure wish I had started writing this in Las Vegas. Wait a minute - I DID!!! Problem is that I only did it for a couple of days. Then I was having so much fun, it didn't seem to matter. Oh well, I'm just doing this as a kind of "scrapbook" for the three of us and a fun way to share our experience with whomever is interested! The one thing that the three of us can agree upon is that we pretty much did nothing today. We had reservations for Michael Mina's, a 5 star restaurant at the Bellagio hotel. Here are some pictures that we took while walking around the hotel before dinner. These bears were in an area of the hotel where it was actually SNOWING!!! I don't know how they did it, but there are just so many amazing things to see in Las Vegas that make you say "how'd they do that???".

This is a Christmas tree that is made up entirely of hand blown glass flowers in every color imaginable...

This was the main Christmas tree in the lobby of the Bellagio. It was absolutely HUGE. I can't even guess how high it actually was, but I will bet that it rivaled the tree at Rockefeller Center.

This display of evening purses was in one of the shops somewhere in the Bellagio. We were in such total AWE at the sheer opulence of everything. Even the casino floor could only be described as opulent. It was not noise like the casino at our hotel. I actually considered getting us rooms here in stead of the Rio - American Express gave me the most incredible price you can imagine. BUT... you remember that $36 bar bill??? It would have been double here.

Las Vegas Christmas 2005 - Day Three

Christmas Eve at the Rio

It's now Saturday, I think. Went to the champagne brunch at the hotel. OMG - you simply would NOT believe the food. Not just the quantity, but the variety. Of course, we met at the ibar. (No drinks, just a central place to meet) There wasn't much of a line to get in to the buffet. After being seated, we ordered (what else???) MIMOSAS. Then - off to the chow line. It was just incredible. I swear the whole buffet was about 100 yards long. Every type of cuisine was represented - Mexican, Italian, Oriental - even good old American barbeque, prime rib, chicken, turkey - you name it!!! I had breakfast (Eggs Benedict, fruit, sausage) and don't know what anybody else had. I worked hard to finish what I had put on my plate. I didn't mean to go for dessert, but I couldn't help myself. I'm going to only list those things that interested me. Believe me, there was plenty more!!! Crepes Suzette Bananas Foster Cheesecake Creme Brulee Chocolate Eclairs "Make Your Own" Sundae Bar Pies - of every description Cakes - of every description Tortes Honestly and truly, I got a small portion of Crepes Suzette, a couple of mini eclairs, a fruit tart, a teeny little piece of carrot cake, a mini service of ice cream. COME ON FOLKS - I HAVE A SMALL APPETITE!!! And a small stomach. HONESTLY!!! I put away as much as I possibly could. At least I have painted a picture for you of the bountiful buffet. The rest of the day was spent walking around, groaning and complaining how stuffed we were. A little window shopping, a little gambling, a little napping. I still stuck with the slots. There were TV screens all over the place with advertisements playing almost constantly and seductively. Sensory overload!

The "Masquerade Show in the Sky" was just great. Huge floats hanging from the sky on tracks over the casino. There was a stage show 7 times a day, followed by the float parade. Here are a couple of pictures of the parade in the sky...

It was pretty spectacular. Loud music, beautiful guys and gals. The parade was preceded with clowns, guys on stilts, throwing of beads and general merriment.

This was my favorite float:

After every parade in the sky, there was an area where you could have your picture taken with a Chippendale or a real Las Vegas showgirl. I guess you could say I got a little out of control...

Dinner on Christmas Eve was at the steakhouse at the hotel. It was a quiet affair and the details will remain in Vegas. This evening is best left in the memories of the participants. More soon.

Las Vegas Christmas 2005 - Day Two (cont.)

It's Friday night in Vegas. I had been wanting to see this show for years - literally! So, I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to see a fabulous show, enjoy being with my folks, and experience a true Las Vegas experience. It was definately an experience. This is the only information I had on the show before tonight. So, with tickets in hand, we walk from "Emeril's" at the MGM Grand to the theater at New York New York. Being in the hotel was exactly like being in New York City, even though it was on a smaller scale. The hustle and bustle, the crowds, the noise - it was all there. As we entered the theater, there was an area to the left where you could have your picture taken - complete with props! Well, it didn't take any persuasion for mom and I to each pick up a feather boa and pose seductively with dad. What's wrong with this picture??? So - what the heck, we were in Vegas, baby! And we were there to have fun. Fun we had!!! Witness...

Yes, this is for real. Father, mother, daughter. What were we thinking? "We're in Las Vegas and in Vegas - what happens here, stays here". Not your usual wholesome family picture, but what the heck - we're here to cut up and have fun. Not give a hoot what anyone else thinks!!!

This is the brochure that we got when we arrived at the theater. I had thought that our seats were in the nosebleed section, but as it turned out, we were the fourth row back from the stage. That turned out to be a GOOD thing, as people in the first through the third rows were singled out by the dildo wielding clowns. Yes, you read correctly.

The show was so surreal that I can't even remember the sequence of events. When the show started, it was as though we were transported to another time and place. The "emcee" or "host/hostess" for the evening was a transvestite. Throughout the evening, a dominatrix would stroll the performance, snapping her whip. There was one act where two (seemingly naked) women cavorted in a huge champagne glass filled with water. They were acrobats and performed feats that you can only imagine. There were contortionists, acrobats, dancers, half human and half animal actors - things of only your imagination. There was a centaur, gorgeous women and beautiful men. Something to please everyone. Once the show started, the three of us just sat with our collective mouths open, taking in the sights and sounds.

During the finale portion of the show, the spotlight was focused on members of the audience. There was one couple that had been married for 39 years. The emcee (aka transvestite) asked the guy if he took Viagra. His response was "I have to". It was a hoot. Then, they invited an audience member to come on stage and join the "orgy" and invited the aforementioned couple, but rather than joining the "orgy", they danced. Very classy. It might have been a part of the performance but we'll never know.

I won't go into detail about the guy with the brass penis, or the "wolf woman" (half clothed), but one thing of note is the pure sensuality of the whole experience. Although many of the characters appeared to be totally nude, it was an illusion. Yes, most of the women (and all of the men) were topless, everyone wore skin suits with patches of "hair" sewn on to give the appearance of total nudity.

I can't speak for mom or dad, but I enjoyed it very much. Yes, it was different, erotic, strange and exciting - but that's what I wanted to experience. I can only hope that mom and dad enjoyed it as much as I did. (We don't talk about it - therefore, no embarrassment)

Whew - that's enough for now. Tomorrow (in Vegas) is Christmas Eve day. We're going to spend the day investigating and familiarizing ourselves with our hotel. A lazy day with nothing specific to do!

Las Vegas Christmas 2005 - Day Two

Friday, December 23rd 2005

This picture must have been taken at Antonio's on Thursday night. (Please note dad's blue flannel shirt - you may see it again soon) Friday was a day of "exploring" our hotel. We pretty much "hung out" and just enjoyed being together. The weather was just gorgeous. We toured the grounds and pool area. I hope that I can come back in the summer. The pool has a sandy beach and there are rocky "grottos" with whirlpool spas scattered all over the exterior.

If you are thinking that I enjoyed myself just a little, well you are certainly entitled to your opinion. There were so many shops in the hotel, we had to hit them every day in order to see what they had to offer. And BOY did they have a lot to offer. To wit...

When we got to the MGM (which is where Emeril's is located) we had some time to kill, so we perused some of the shops nearby. It's hard to describe, but there are things found in shops in Las Vegas that aren't found anywhere else you can possibly imagine. I can't even begin to describe the specific items, but we're talking boots, jackets, dresses, blouses, jewelry - all in designs that you would see nowhere else.

Emeril Lagasse's restaurant is simply called "Emeril's". We had made (unnecessary) reservations for 5:00 - NOBODY in Las Vegas eats that early. We had cocktails (natch) and enjoyed our surroundings which were surprisingly sparse. Mom ordered a smoked salmon appetizer which she ended up ordering again as her entree. Dad and I had lobster bisque, which essentially ruined our appetites, but that was OK - it was great. I ordered the smoked salmon roll, wrapped in nori (seaweed) and deep fried. I didn't realize that it was going to be raw in the middle, but it was. I must admit that it was absolutely fabulous.

After dinner, we went to New York New York to see the Cirque du Soleil production "Zumanity". More later. Adults only, please.

Las Vegas Christmas 2005

Where else to begin this wonderful vacation but the bar? Not just any bar – the “ibar”, a circular bar in the middle of the Rio Hotel & Casino. I dumped my suitcases in the room and called dad who told me to meet him in the circle bar. After I greeted mom and dad, I looked down at the cocktail napkin and knew that this was the place for me!!! The napkin read: i am dangerous i am sexy i am exciting i am confident “IT’S ALL ABOUT ME NOW” That’s my slogan for 2006. This was the first drink that marked the end of 2005 and the beginning of not just a new year, but a new life and lifestyle for me. It was a goodie, too – a Belvedere martini, up – very dry with a twist. It was probably three times larger than any martini I ever had. When the tab came, I found out why. It was the COST of three martinis. The bar tab for three drinks was $36 plus tip. Note: My “seatmate” on the flight from Phoenix was a guy from Scotland who gave me a few tips about Vegas. One of them was that when you were gambling you could order brand name liquors. Therefore, while gambling, I ordered Belvedere on the rocks with a wedge of lemon. I honestly do not remember eating dinner that night, although I know we did. I asked dad and he said that we ate at Antonio’s, the Italian restaurant. I guess I was in such a state of pure “pressure release” that I just zoned out. After dinner, we went to the “Masquerade Bar” and saw the first (of many) Carnivale parades and show. The show started out with about a dozen characters, some were clowns, some on stilts, that interacted with the crowd. The music was exactly what you would expect if you were attending Carnivale in Rio de Janiero. That is, until they played the “dolla dance” song. You know how it goes: “Cent, five cent, ten cent, dolla” – it was the dance I learned on a booze cruise beach party in the Bahamas. On the word “cent”, you swing your hips to the left and on “five cent” you swing them to the right. “Ten cent” is where you thrust your hips backward and “dolla” is where you – ok, ok, you get the picture. Anyway, it seems that I was the only person in the whole hotel who knew the dance. Did I dance it? You betcha! After the show, there was a place set up where you could have your picture taken with a real member of the Chippendales. Mom got there first, but I got there best! I think it was the leather pants that set me off!!! I dumped $6 in the slot machine and lost it in about 6 seconds. That’s all the gambling I cared to do that night. The next day was Thursday, December 22nd. I had to unpack, so I ordered corned beef hash and eggs from room service. We had decided the night before that we would go over to Harrah’s other property and then to the MGM Grand to make reservations at “Emeril’s”, Emeril Lagasse’s restaurant for Friday night. A LOT of walking, even though we took the shuttle. This is a picture from the refurbished MGM Grand - it used to be "Wizard of Oz". We knew we weren't in Kansas any more - that's for sure!!!

After some gambling and rest, we met at the seafood restaurant called “Buzio’s”, located at the Rio. Great seafood as I recall. Can’t remember what I ate. Probably lobster. Or scallops. Or shrimp. Whatever. All I remember is that it was GREAT FOOD! I stayed low carb - except for the alcohol.

I think that that we played the slots for a while. I really wanted to play blackjack, but the cheapest table was $10 a hand. I just wasn't quite ready for the "big girl" games. Quarter slots were about as adventurous as I was willing to get. After all, I had only been in Vegas for two nights!!! There was plenty of time for more gambling. And, yes, there would be more gambling.

That's all for now. I'll post more soon. Hope you enjoyed!

Carroll

A Beginning and an End

2005 Ends and 2006 is eagerly awaited

My sister, Corrie, arrived in Arizona on December 9th, 2005. She quit smoking on the 10th and got a job a week later. We spent one evening at the Desert Botanical Gardens annual "Las Noches de las Luminarias" where this picture was taken. She also went with me to a Christmas party at the Irish Cultural Center where we learned Irish folk dancing a/k/a "Irish Squaredancing". I left on December 21st for my Christmas in Vegas (coming later) and returned on the 28th. She took great care of the dogs and we enjoyed our "belated" Christmas on New Year's Eve. It was a nice way to end an old and very exhausting year for both of us.

She picked me up at the airport on the 28th. Here is an account (from my perspective) of what happened that fateful day:

Had a quiet flight, exit row, from Las Vegas to Phoenix. Plane arrived on time. Went to Baggage Claim. Bags came out pretty quick. I had told Corrie to plan on picking me up around 1:30 and I had my bags by 1:10. So…I went to the south side exit, door 6, which seemed to be the quietest side. Decided to call Corrie & let her know where I was, just in case she was early. Here’s how the conversation went from there: Corrie "Hi – where the Hell are you?" Me (Quite proud of myself for being in such a convenient location for curbside pickup) "I’m on the south side of baggage claim at door number 6!" Corrie "What the Hell are you doing there???" Me "I thought it would be the most convenient place to pick me up." Corrie "Well I’m here at the gate that you’re supposed to be at with flowers in my hand waiting for you to come off the plane." Me "Well I’m off the plane and here with my bags." Corrie "Tell me exactly where you are and I’ll be right there." Three minutes later, Corrie shows up with flowers in hand. No problem, all we have to do is catch a bus to the parking garage. Corrie "I know exactly what bus to catch and wrote down exactly where the SUV is parked." Drag two suitcases and computer case to bus waiting area. Wait. Wait. Wait. After 15 minutes, decide to ask someone where to catch “Roadrunner” bus. (All we had seen was“Jackrabbit”) “Catch bus on other side of terminal.” Drag suitcases and computer case to bus waiting area on other side of terminal. Wait. Wait. Finally, here comes “Roadrunner”. Lug suitcases on bus. Run over people’s toes. Ride to parking garage. Lug suitcases from bus to truck. One hour after arrival. Carroll "I’ll drive – you’ve been batting zero so far."

After all of this fiasco, I got a phone call that neccesitated having to work for an

hour before we could even go home.

Upon arriving at the apartment, here were balloons tied with colorful ribbons - "Welcome Home". Under the Christmas tree (a/k/a the fake pre-lit palm tree), were presents wrapped in two shades of pink and decorated with feathers, beads and ribbon.

As previously mentioned, we celebrated Christmas on December 31st and had a wonderful time opening presents of sweaters, jewelry, toiletries, music, books, show tickets (Cirque du Soleil), and other treats and goodies.